Captain Obvious

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Posts by Captain Obvious

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  21

  How to give to Jehovah

  by Satanus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  back in the good old days, when god actually spoke to his great warriors, generally stuff they gave to their god was offered up as burnt offerings.

  they burned thousands of cattle, goats, sheep, lots of cities and even a few people.

  back then, jay hoover got off on the smells of bbqing meat and just generally burning stuff.

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  Captain Obvious

  Unstop-

  There's the true Christian spirit! Burn 'em, just like in the ol' inquisition days. Back then god had a taste for burnt heretics, witches, and anyone who dared question the church... How proud you must be of your spiritual heritage!
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  38

  Newbie

  by Stubborn Disbeliever in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm new here, so i thought i'd start with an introduction and summary of my life, for the most part.

  i have a tendancy to ramble ridiculously, so bear with me :) and this will be all over the place as thoughts take over the keyboard.. i was born a 5th generation jw.

  i never really "felt" it, but was book smart about it.

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  Captain Obvious

  Where does your dad live now? I'll pick up a baseball bat on the way...
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  38

  Newbie

  by Stubborn Disbeliever in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm new here, so i thought i'd start with an introduction and summary of my life, for the most part.

  i have a tendancy to ramble ridiculously, so bear with me :) and this will be all over the place as thoughts take over the keyboard.. i was born a 5th generation jw.

  i never really "felt" it, but was book smart about it.

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  Captain Obvious

  Where does your dad live now? I'll pick up a baseball bat on the way...
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  49

  Is There Other Sites Many Members Are Bailing To? M.I.A JWN People, where did they go?

  by ÁrbolesdeArabia in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  since i joined the forum i noticed more than a few people have not been posting, what is going on?

  i received a couple of emails from other groups asking me to join their new forms with a promised technology, i wondered how they got my email address and thought it be strange.. .

  people during the first year of a great change might post daily to any support chat or message board they feel is going to aid them.

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  Captain Obvious

  Yup. As mentioned before, there are many new discussion groups. Many are invitation-only. Many started after the big atheist/believer wars where many ignorant things were said by all. Some were banned, others just left. It's very unfortunate, we lost some of our very best posters over that little kafuffle.
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  47

  OATMEAL

  by compound complex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i wanted eggs for breakfast when i was a kid, but we were poor.

  bobby, my little brother, got an egg once a week for breakfast and sis and i got oatmeal.

  oatmeal everyday with blue powdered milk.

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  Captain Obvious

  I love oatmeal! Almost as much as i love eggs. With cinnamon and brown sugar. Or, with cinnamon, vanilla, honey and peanut butter. Yes, peanut butter. Don't knock it till you try it!
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  23

  breaking up is hard to do

  by fresh prince of ohio in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  background: i joined the jws when i was 21, left about 11 years ago.. up until recently, i had never been in a relationship that went longer than a few months.

  and that was just one.. i've been with my current for the past 3.5 years.

  she's, just, okay.. i've never felt like, oh, i love her so much.

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  Captain Obvious

  Fresh Prince,

  There's plenty of tin cans at the dump.
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  23

  breaking up is hard to do

  by fresh prince of ohio in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  background: i joined the jws when i was 21, left about 11 years ago.. up until recently, i had never been in a relationship that went longer than a few months.

  and that was just one.. i've been with my current for the past 3.5 years.

  she's, just, okay.. i've never felt like, oh, i love her so much.

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  Captain Obvious

  WHY the hell are you doing this to her? At what point did you think maybe you should see yourself at a crossroads? You're already settling for her, it'll show in your relationship. You resent her already. Love isn't like that. Love isn't all storybook stuff, but it's REAL. When you meet the right girl, you want everyone to know! You are always thinking of new ways to impress her or spoil her. You treat her like a queen, and she treats you like a king because that's what you are to her. Before I married my lady, I had NO plans to settle down anytime soon. With the right girl, you can't wait to settle down. At the time I could have written a book about what I love about her and why I was marrying her. Now some years down the road I could write you a damn encyclopaedia full of reasons why mine is the best lady. THAT'S what love is like.

  I'm not sure what you don't like about this girl... Is she not attractive? Not very bright? Lazy? Don't forget you must take the good with the bad. Don't be a Jerry Seinfeld now... (But she had man hands...)

  Here's some real advice. Hit the Internet, read up on game. Get yourself some game, it will benefit you forever. Also, immediately break up with this girl. Give her the "it's not you, it's me" speech a la George Costanza. Sign up at your local gym, hit the gym. Go buy some new clothes. You've been doing well, treat yourself and upgrade the wardrobe. What do you drive? The new BMWs are nice. Are you balding? Shave that shit.

  Now sign up on a couple of online dating sites and make a profile. Nothing crazy, just the real you. Meet some girls, date around a bit. Get a feel for what you really want, and for ways you can improve in a relationship. When you meet the right girl, you'll know.

  Don't thank me, just do it. You're not getting any younger.
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  45

  Sex before marriage would eliminate a lot of unhappy marriages in the Borg...

  by sinis in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  sensible, safe sex, in my opinion, should be engaged in.

  because, as you get older and are ready to settle down, you will look at your potential sole mate, not for sexual reasons, but for what they have to offer mentally and if they are compatible.

  when religion restricts this, and yuo must marry to have sex, i believe that you doom a marriage at the outset, because these young folks marry out of lust, only to have the rose colored blinders pulled off later, and regret the entire arrangement... .

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  Captain Obvious

  Not determining sexual compatibility before marrying is a HUGE roll of the dice IMO.

  My JW wife and I have agreed many times that we would have rather lived together for a good couple years before getting married. And we dated for 2 years! Along time in Dub land.
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  61

  What do you believe about the bible?

  by bethelyellowdollarbag in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i'm interested in how we all view the bible?.

  let me start by offering three different options:.

  a.. a book that at best may have cultural or historical interest but that is it.. b.. a divinely inspired guide that i consult to make important life choices.

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  Captain Obvious

  I believe the bible is REAL!

  I have one. It's printed on paper, I can touch it and pick it up. When I pick it up and open it...

  There's nothing inside but bullshit.
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  12

  Has The Governing Body Ever Explained Why They View The Faithful Slave Parable As A Prophecy? What Justification Do They Give?

  by frankiespeakin in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i don't know of any do you.

  i would think it a major leap in logic to not concider this first before expounding on it prophetically, why go thru the bother if we are missing this important link..

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  Captain Obvious

  Easy. How do we know its a prophecy? Because we're the faithful slave! How do we know we're the faithful slave? Because it was prophesied!

  Circular reasoning at its very best. Beyond that, I've never seen a good explanation.